0028 Naked Adventure

“If we take off our color-coded pads,” Lian says, “how are people supposed to know who we are?”

“Oh my god!” Lori says. “Duh! Our natural beauty! I have like, so many social media followers, so I am not worried about me. Oh my god you girls need to attend one of my ‘how to not suck at being an influencer’ webinars. Ask yourself this, would you not recognize one of the influencers you follow online? If that is a yes, then you need to attend one of my ‘build stronger identity branding’ webinars.”

“Shangchi government has me blacklisted,” Lian says with a sigh, “I can’t even open a Froogle account, get a credit card, sign up for streaming, book a flight, open a bank account, or play anything other than retro games the don’t require account sign-ins.”

“Even if you are not a citizen?” Lori says. “That is so lame! You think you would have some rights on-line, you know? Well, I can get you hooked up, one of my sponsors is a VPN provider. Why are you blacklisted?”

“A democracy movement I never knew anything about in Zoshan province adopted my photo of me standing on top of that mountain with my fist raised high as one of their symbols,” Lian says. “Now I am a nobody. They will throw me back in jail if I ever go back. And since their money controls everything on-line, no Western company will touch me for fear of reprisal.”

“That, and Luna killed like, a thousand of their soldiers freeing you,” Lori says. “Not your fault but oh my god no one should piss off Lexi’s mom for any reason because she will bring down unholy hell on everyone involved and not give two flying frags about it. Freaking monster kill streak nonstop with her.”

“Yeah,” Lian says, “I know. Auntie Luna loves me though.”

“I have died and went to beautiful things heaven,” Miguel says. “The last two sweets have arrived.”

“I am not sweet unless you taste me,” Lori says. “You know, you have to know. Oh my god who are you? Let me guess, Pedro Mendoza, that famous actor guy from Throne of Thorns and the Space Vengelorian! Oh my god, girls, major influencer event! Plus one million followers each if we get him on our streams!”

Lana rolls her eyes. “None of our moms have streams. Lian can’t even log on, and Lexi and I have like, three followers between us. I just use mine to watch videos.”

“I always get these dick pics whenever I log in for MyBook,” Lorna says.

Lian laughs. “Like those guides we had who were cranking it every time we turned around?”

Miguel clears his throat. “Excuse me, my beauties, you may have me mistaken for that famous actor. As you see, I look nothing like him, but if I may offer, I am so much more handsome than he.”

“You still look like him,” Lori says with a laugh. “Okay, okay, we can pretend you are El Presidente, but I am still going to do a livestream with you, Pedro Hunko. Oh my god, stretch limo, plus 50K followers if we stream in a hot car, tell your moms to setup VidTube accounts and get me their usernames, I will get them shout-outs.”

Miguel blinks and stares at Lana. “Do I really look like him?”

Lana laughs. “If you were an actor playing this role you would totally be him.”